SLOW Day!

Snow rhymes with slow.  When the snow starts to fall in the South, we either get really excited or really aggravated.  I'm a teacher, and just like a kid I get excited - every time! I wasn't convinced we were going to be gifted a little snow day, but when I looked out the window Friday, I breathed.  I mean, I'm always breathing, but this was different.  It was the kind of breathing that you are aware of.  You feel it going in and out of your lungs.  ( I was recovering from bronchitis, so I was already aware of the physical breaths that were improving, but this was deeper than physical - I breathed into my soul.)

The light had not made its appearance for the day, so like an oversized kid, I ran and dove back under the covers!  I lay in my bed with a huge smile that would not go away.  I tried with all my might to sleep; however,  I was too excited!  I did get to take about 1000 naps throughout the day.  It was glorious!  

My kids enjoyed the day, and all of us shifted into a speed we are not familiar with - slow.  Because of this majestic white stuff, we had a SLOW day!  Our day turned into a weekend, and we spent time together - all six of us!  We had just come off a week of 4 kids' schedules plus a parent who coaches and another parent who does EVERYTHING!  We had grabbed fast food EVERY night that week!  We were on a crazy roller coaster of coming into the station to unload, only to catch another coaster to our next destination.  Now, roller coasters are exciting and exhilarating, but we can't ride one forever.  It loses its fun if we ride it every day for a week.  All weeks are not this crazy, but this one was a doozy.  

My daughter and I ventured out to the grocery store to buy food to cook.  I hear this is what many families do.  Upon arriving back home, I announced that no one was to eat out for the next week, and that I would have something home cooked every day for the next week.  I received the usual rolled eyes and surprised eyebrows, but it is now Sunday, and I have kept up my end of the bargain.  

I have a senior, a junior, a seventh grader, and a first grader.  I understand how precious my time with my people is.  We missed games, a prayer conference, a party, and a reunion.  We made a first  (ever) basketball game, where our little eaglette scored all 4 of his teams' points!  We made a last parade for my oldest daughter to march in as a Tigerette.  We ate breakfast, lunch, and dinner - together.  We laughed, we played, we teased each other, and we all enjoyed it.  (Yes, I speak for everyone, but I know the truth.)

When I started this blog venture, I was in the worst spiritual and mental shape of my life.  I snuggled my eaglette to sleep one night over the weekend, and as he nuzzled into me, I breathed.  I thanked the Lord for this precious gift that makes me remember what's important.  I enjoyed time with each of my children.  They are all at different stages, and have diverse personalities, and my Lord created each one of them.  I am honored to be chosen as their mother.  I am ever so grateful for time to slow down and just enjoy being a family.  

I could go into detail about each of them, and one day I'm sure I will.  What I want to share is this...

"Lord, you have established peace for us; all that we have accomplished, You have done for us" (Isaiah 26:12).

Peace.  This is not always a place I live.  I  have suffered with  anxiety since I was a small child.  Sometimes, I let it rule me, even when I know better.  I'm well into my forties now, and I've experienced "getting older".  I learned recently that I have an issue with the rhythm of my heart.  I don't know how long it has been affecting me, but I know the tiny little pill my doctor prescribed for me makes me understand what it's like to feel "normal".  If I had not sought out the help from my doctor, I would have just thought I was feeling panicky, which I've dealt with since my childhood.  This involved wearing a heart monitor for three weeks, which was definitely an inconvenience, but I would do it again to feel the way I do now.

Living in peace is new for me.  I've done it before, but it has been a long time.  It's amazing, and I want it for you all.  For those of you who find yourself in the midst of fear, anxiety, depression, or discouragement, I know those places all too well.  These places are not your permanent residences.   Just as I had to find my remedy, physically, we all have to reach in spiritually and mentally to find the answer we need.  You are not alone.  You are not crazy.  Life is unpredictable and mean.  It doesn't wait on us to be prepared, it attacks when we are weak.

What I want to convey is, God does have a plan for us.  He will use our weaknesses to show His strength, and to use us to strengthen others.  I hope you all get a chance to slow down this Christmas season.  Please know, He is for you!  He waits, and he will never get tired of waiting on us to find Him.

I hope you all get to experience whatever it is that makes your Christmas white.

Expectant,
Ashley